Just My Luck: The Feng Shui Experience

The eminent physicist Neils Bohr was once said to have hung a horsehoe on his cabin door. A colleague who happened to visit asked him if he, a man of science, believed in that superstition. Bohr supposedly replied that he understood that the horseshoe will bring luck, whether you believe or not...

So it was with me just last tuesday. when our new office was subjected to the wit and wisdom of a geomancer. my boss is hardcore believer in Feng Shui, and prior to our moving in, he asked the services of a well-known Geo' to check the spots. The Year of the Fire Dog is approaching, and well, we're bidding goodbye to the year of the rooster, with all its relative cockups, and what could be better than to have your office Fire Dog friendly?

personally, my hyperactive imagination would've preferred a visit from a Necromancer - you know a Lord of the Rings type character. Imagine you and your officemates gathered round when the 'mancer suddenly whips out a wand (or something like this) and your dead grandfather appears and tells you to sell the house. Whoa!

im rambling again...damn. must be the withdrawal symptoms.

as it turned out, this geomancer was a Chinese character in his own right. More or less. I won't delve into this characterness as i am a firm believer in not pushing your luck, especially when luck on is on this guy's side instead of mine. Anyway, we met with this gentleman (whose name i will not mention as i don't give out free advertising except to those wonderful FedEx guys) and he promised to give us a 2 minute seminar on how Feng Shui works for our lives. Turns out we are like cellphones and television sets, where we give off energy and receive energy in return. That probably explains why i'm low batt most of the time, and why friends keep telling me they get mixed signals from me...

It turned out 2 minutes and a half hour, including all intros and feng shui jokes...

Anyways, after the 2-minute thingamajig, we trooped to our new quarters, complete with the smell of new paint and the tinny hammering of ductings. Armed with a compass, he then went room to room, inquired about the occupant's birthday and then proceeded to give him/her advice on how to make the room conducive to luck. It consisted on where to face your chair and table, what to hang on walls, and what to put on the window.

for my room, i was asked to put my table and chair parallel and left of the door, which is a bit funny but hey...don't argue with a guy who carted home big bucks just for telling you where to move your furniture. I was also asked to put up a horse painting, a waterfall and a picture of Manila Bay. Oh yes, and hang a Chinese Scroll on the window. At least i don't have to put bamboo behind my back like Richard and Migs.

Of course, i didn't let the day finish without me asking the inevitable question: "Will my Sacramento Kings paraphernalia clash with Feng Shui?" He said it wouldn't matter, and that i took his word for. The heck with it, even if somebody points out that a purple mini-backboard clashes with a picture of Manila Bay, i'll just ignore their remarks and point some of my crystals at them.

That should be enough to sap the good luck out of them. And i hope putting a small TV won't be sapping my positive Chi.

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