Ice Carvings

I hurt myself today  To see if I still feel  I focus on the pain  The only thing that's real  The needle tears a hole The old familiar sting  Try to kill it all away  But I remember everything  What have I become  My sweetest friend  Everyone I know goes away  In the end  And you could have it all  My empire of dirt  I will let you down  I will make you hurt  I wear this crown of thorns  Upon my liar's chair  Full of broken thoughts  I cannot repair  Beneath the stains of time  The feelings disappear  You are someone else  I am still right here If I could start again  A million miles away  I would keep myself  I would find a way

we were brothers. granted, the past few years, we hardly spoke to each other. the hard partying, hard charging, hardingest hardcore cousin i have, went down fighting. by losing, he won. he freed himself and everybody from the pain. That's the cousin i know. Defiant to the end. Rest in peace bro. The band will do a reunion tour in your honor. ----- postscript:  Reading this post after a year or so, I have had more than enough time to contemplate. now i can lash out: What the fuck did I do to ruin this? Granted I am a selfish, thieving, arrogant bastard, who the hell in the group isn't? What made me so special I became the pariah? I still have no fucking clue. And yes, the band did a reunion. And we laughed, got teary-eyed. Drank a lot as usual. Swore to resume the brotherhood despite the fact one has fallen. Guess again. Can't stand talking to one, and haven't heard from the other. And I don't mind. More importantly, neither do they. We&