Letter to Nel
Dearest Nel,
Despite your expectations, I have failed you as a romantic.
I don’t write love letters anymore. I won you over by writing you thousands of words of sweet nothings, and you kept them all and wanted more. Nowadays, however, I only send you messages via email, and the subject is most likely something that starts with “FWD: FWD: FWD: THIS IS REALLY FUNNY!”
I am a lousy dinner companion. While you enjoy flowing conversation over a nice candlelit dinner with soft music as background, years of being with me have dampened your expectations. At present, I am more excited with the prospect of timing the pizza delivery guy and hoping that he arrives after 31 minutes. In case we do go out, I often embarrass you by ordering something spicy and end up red-faced and sweaty.
I am insufferable when watching videos. You envision a quiet evening watching classics like “A Love Affair,” “Sleepless in Seattle,” and “Notting Hill.” I eagerly occupy half the sofa and scan with the remote for shows like “WWE Smackdown,” “South Park” reruns, and National Geographic specials that show herbivores being hunted and eaten by carnivores. Even if I agree to watch a romantic movie, I inadvertently ruin the moment by eating cheese curls and wiping my fingers on my shirt.
I don’t fall asleep romantically. Instead of you curling up in my arms as we bid good night as evening falls, I doze off with my glasses and headphones on, a book on my chest, and more often than not, leave the bathroom light on. I also snore when drunk.
I don’t look good when i wake up. In your dreams you wished for me to have a healthy, glowing countenance every morning, getting up promptly and greeting you a hearty good morning. I am none of this. I get up because I have to, with my hair all sticking up, and feverishly groping for my glasses, whereupon I knock off the lamp, some books, the clock, and everything else on the bedside table. If you’re not looking, I go back to bed immediately.
I don’t dress to impress. You envisioned Prince Charming as a classy dresser, well-groomed, and ever alert to the changing fashion trends. I am none of the above, hanging on to the same pair of jeans that I bought when I first met you in 1995, and howling violently in protest every time you condemn my favorite striped shirt (which I wear on my birthday for over a decade now) to spend its remaining life as a dish rag.
I know that in your dreams, you wanted a knight in shining armor, one who will cross the driest desert and the deepest sea, and will slay the dragon that keeps you imprisoned.
Sad to say, I'm still the same. I dress shabbily, am unfit for long trips because I thirst and hunger easily (plus require frequent bathroom breaks), and very unwilling (short of afraid) to slay insects, much more larger reptiles.
Despite all these failures, here i am giving the gift of me.
Instead of chasing adventures and slaying dragons, I will stay by your side.
I will wake up grudgingly every day, and show up for work, if only to provide you with the niceties and comforts you deserve.
I will be patient and listen more. I will care about what happened to your day, and I will offer an extra eye, a helping hand, or a shoulder to cry on.
I will appreciate what you’ve done with the house, what dishes you’ve managed to whip, and what decorations you’ve made. I will help with the chores and in cases when needed, I will bring out my beloved tool collection and actually use them to install fixtures and repair equipment.
The soonest we have children, I will try very hard to remember their names, birthdays, likes and dislikes, as well as help in raising them properly. I will set a good example and tell them no matter how boring it may seem, an honest day’s work is always better than anything else offered.
I’m just an ordinary guy performing ordinary work and living an ordinary life.
You, on the other hand, make me special.
Happy Valentines Day!
---
Happy VD to everyone else!
Despite your expectations, I have failed you as a romantic.
I don’t write love letters anymore. I won you over by writing you thousands of words of sweet nothings, and you kept them all and wanted more. Nowadays, however, I only send you messages via email, and the subject is most likely something that starts with “FWD: FWD: FWD: THIS IS REALLY FUNNY!”
I am a lousy dinner companion. While you enjoy flowing conversation over a nice candlelit dinner with soft music as background, years of being with me have dampened your expectations. At present, I am more excited with the prospect of timing the pizza delivery guy and hoping that he arrives after 31 minutes. In case we do go out, I often embarrass you by ordering something spicy and end up red-faced and sweaty.
I am insufferable when watching videos. You envision a quiet evening watching classics like “A Love Affair,” “Sleepless in Seattle,” and “Notting Hill.” I eagerly occupy half the sofa and scan with the remote for shows like “WWE Smackdown,” “South Park” reruns, and National Geographic specials that show herbivores being hunted and eaten by carnivores. Even if I agree to watch a romantic movie, I inadvertently ruin the moment by eating cheese curls and wiping my fingers on my shirt.
I don’t fall asleep romantically. Instead of you curling up in my arms as we bid good night as evening falls, I doze off with my glasses and headphones on, a book on my chest, and more often than not, leave the bathroom light on. I also snore when drunk.
I don’t look good when i wake up. In your dreams you wished for me to have a healthy, glowing countenance every morning, getting up promptly and greeting you a hearty good morning. I am none of this. I get up because I have to, with my hair all sticking up, and feverishly groping for my glasses, whereupon I knock off the lamp, some books, the clock, and everything else on the bedside table. If you’re not looking, I go back to bed immediately.
I don’t dress to impress. You envisioned Prince Charming as a classy dresser, well-groomed, and ever alert to the changing fashion trends. I am none of the above, hanging on to the same pair of jeans that I bought when I first met you in 1995, and howling violently in protest every time you condemn my favorite striped shirt (which I wear on my birthday for over a decade now) to spend its remaining life as a dish rag.
I know that in your dreams, you wanted a knight in shining armor, one who will cross the driest desert and the deepest sea, and will slay the dragon that keeps you imprisoned.
Sad to say, I'm still the same. I dress shabbily, am unfit for long trips because I thirst and hunger easily (plus require frequent bathroom breaks), and very unwilling (short of afraid) to slay insects, much more larger reptiles.
Despite all these failures, here i am giving the gift of me.
Instead of chasing adventures and slaying dragons, I will stay by your side.
I will wake up grudgingly every day, and show up for work, if only to provide you with the niceties and comforts you deserve.
I will be patient and listen more. I will care about what happened to your day, and I will offer an extra eye, a helping hand, or a shoulder to cry on.
I will appreciate what you’ve done with the house, what dishes you’ve managed to whip, and what decorations you’ve made. I will help with the chores and in cases when needed, I will bring out my beloved tool collection and actually use them to install fixtures and repair equipment.
The soonest we have children, I will try very hard to remember their names, birthdays, likes and dislikes, as well as help in raising them properly. I will set a good example and tell them no matter how boring it may seem, an honest day’s work is always better than anything else offered.
I’m just an ordinary guy performing ordinary work and living an ordinary life.
You, on the other hand, make me special.
Happy Valentines Day!
---
Happy VD to everyone else!
Comments
Nel is so lucky.
How are you buddy.
Happy VD! Believe me, it's not as good as advertised ha ha.
Anyway, keep your chin up. You may not find it, but it may find you.